you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We need to get me chipped asap
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
