You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
kristin has been a bad kristin
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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