I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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