just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
