Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
