How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
