is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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