meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
