He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
