I could have mohawked her pubes.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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