Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
This toilet bowl is my home.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
