Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize