Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize