She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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