i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
