drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
