We're like a lot better than the average bears
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
