yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Randomize
