Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
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