I'm lost and stupid without you.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
