You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
