Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I think I just shit out all my problems.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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