Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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