you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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