first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
