Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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