id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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