I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
