I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
