So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize