Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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