hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
