Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
