So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I supernannyed him into submission
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
