smell my finger.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
