Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
NoShamevember. You game?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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