I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
