you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize