What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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