And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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