he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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