Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
