what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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