when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I bet he comes in French.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize