Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize