just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
