do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Randomize
