is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
