guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
