If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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