Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
